Deliveryman Dodgeball

Working in the Financial District of Boston, I see a lot of deliverymen. FedEx, UPS, W. B. Mason, etc. I don’t think I know anyone who has one of these jobs but I know if I did I would first ask if they already did this and then if they didn’t suggest they start playing.

Deliveryman Dodgeball is what I would call the game. Basically in Boston, and many big cities where traffic/parking is a problem, there are a whole lot of parking enforcement officers (formerly known more colloquially as “meter maids”). These people are ruthless at handing out parking tickets. Meanwhile, these deliverymen are parking wherever they feel like it and they don’t really give a damn. I see parking tickets on their trucks all the time and I’m sure the delivery companies are willing to bite the bullet on them for the sake of business.

The object of the game? To avoid getting a parking ticket at all costs. Park legally, run to make deliveries, negotiate out of a ticket, etc. This could get pretty fun, especially if I ever saw someone obviously playing. Now I imagine that the faster deliveries are made, the faster the person can get home, which is why this game might be annoying to do everyday. Though I feel like doing it once a month with a bunch of co-workers and the winner(s) getting a free drink at the bar afterwards would add something fun to the daily grind.

By Matt Aromando

Stand-up, improv, and sketch comedian.

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *