I have many petty beliefs. My right to judge people’s t-shirts is one that I’ll never let go.
Recently I saw someone wearing a t-shirt with this printed on it (recreated by me):
Underneath that it declared it was, “The Formula For Success.”
That is not a formula. It is a list of elements on the periodic table. A chemical formula looks something like H2O (or exactly like H2O if you’re talking about water) which, “express[es] information about the proportions of atoms that constitute a particular chemical compound, using a single line of chemical element symbols, numbers, and sometimes also other symbols.”
Anyways, if we do pretend that collection of elements is a formula, let’s see what’s in it!
- Calcium: For strong bones, a logical ingredient to success.
- Sulfur: Useful in making matches. That makes sulfur 🔥🔥🔥 (aka, lit) (aka, a description of a highly successful event).
- Hydrogen: This element is basically everywhere, so of course it’s also in the formula for success.
- Molybdenum: Used in steel, hard to melt. Hmm, steel is a very successful metal so by the transitive property, it must also make for a successful formula.
- Neon: Used in neon lights, those can be pretty cool. Success!
- Yttrium: Used in LED lights and emits light/is luminescent. It can also be used in the production of lasers! I successfully looked up yttrium.
What a stupid way to get the words, “Cash Money,” onto a t-shirt. Hire a graphic designer.
